#alibaba'sstory
- I have a serious matter at hand that I want to share. In fact, I should have
shared this long ago, but the primary message from a friend that prompted the
matter, was lost in between the series of inbox messages from those strange
girls that are looking for romantic friendships on Facebook. In a nutshell, a
lady friend sent me an inbox message on how it's harder to find a good man in
Nigeria. And that the men who are "manageable" (her words, not mine)
are so scarce and if you ever get them they are either married to a lady that
does not deserve them or just repenting from a bad marriage from one of such
women. Or even just lost faith in the whole marriage thing.
I
later ran into her at a club. After the usual introductions that have become common
place with these social media network of friends... I chatted with her a bit
and found out from what she told me, that, many women are now settling for
anything in between MR Right, MR Not just ok and MR Nearly right. As she put
it, it's now a case of looking at what a guy checks out in the top 10 box...
And if he has 3 out of 10, snap him up... Work on the rest 7, if you are lucky,
you can get him to add 3 more of those top10 qualities... And begin to pray it
lasts for as long as you both can manage. Much as I tried, to get her to rate
me, she said, she can only rate someone who is on her radar. So ladies have
relationship radar? Yes of course. You think you were not in Mary's radar, and
she waited for you to come back after you... ? Ouch!!! (That was my guy who was
listening in on our private conversation) I wasn't on Mary's radar.... I
managed to mutter. Then she fooled you wellllll. She quickly added.
It
got me thinking... What does a man need to show to get on any woman's radar?
Money, sense of humour, fame, dress sense, good job, intelligence, good
diction, good physique, some visible signs of affluence, confidence... She let
me continue for a while, raised her glass of Henessy VSOP, downed it, and said,
"He must first be AVAILABLE. Then you can begin to check out the
rest."
So
I asked, “do I look available?”
She
said, "Of course, to the people who do not care if you are married, you
are very available! Not to me, OOO. Mary was my boss at Platinum. So that
strikes you out."
So
I asked the next possible question, "so what can I do to look
unavailable?"
There
is nothing. You are even an easy pick. She added. Any man who has a source of
income, popular, dresses well, tall, handsome small sef, has a car, is in the
circles of successful people, looks like he has potentials to become somebody
important and can pay the bills...
Our
conversation started having K- leg when she lit a cigar, not cigarette, Cuban
cigar and started smoking. I took a good look at her, and realized that, these
women who are looking for a MR Right all over Lagos, may just have met him but
he is also looking for a woman who doesn't drink alcohol or smoke anything at
all.
That
is the wahala.
As
you are looking for MR right, he might be dodging you because you are all
shades of wrong... While you are looking waiting for a guy to walk in and fit
into your radar, you are doing some things that also confine you to the
"never my type" hemisphere...
So,
in conclusion, just as good men are hard to find, "manageable" ladies
are unicorns!!!!
What
is GOOSE for Uganda... Is GOOD for PERU...
Your views are most welcome...
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